As part of a routine drug test, Adam Randall handed a vial of yellow liquid to a probation officer.
Although it looked like a urine sample from the 31-year-old — who was required to submit to testing after a previous conviction — authorities in Queensbury, N.Y., say it was not. They allege that Randall turned over a synthetic liquid he had sneaked into the probation office via a bottle stuffed into his pants, a substance so in demand that states are now taking steps to ban it: fake pee.
I just wanted everyone to know that I spent the last 2 weeks on this site trying to figure out the best way to pass a 5 Panel DOT drug test at Quest Diagnostics. I'm 6'4' 207 male 29yrs old. I had a pre-employment drug test with a large employer in the PNW. I smoked everyday for the past 10. But in 2016, some changes were made to the testing requirements, and now urea is one of the elements that these testing companies look for. Does P Sure Have Uric Acid? No, the P Sure synthetic urine doesn’t contain uric acid or urea, which is the major downside to the product. Clear Choice Sub-Solution was launched in 2003, 17 years later this product still thrives as being the best of its class. Clear Choice prides itself for having the best synthetic urine formula on the market. Aug 29, 2015 I just wanted everyone to know that I spent the last 2 weeks on this site trying to figure out the best way to pass a 5 Panel DOT drug test at Quest Diagnostics. I'm 6'4' 207 male 29yrs old. I had a pre-employment drug test with a large employer in the PNW. I smoked everyday for the past 10. We are proud to bring you the newest imitation urine substitution device on the market - Monkey Whizz! This amazing package comes ready to use right out of the box! Comes complete with over 3.5oz. Of the highest quality imitation urine toxin and disease free urine available, attached to an adjustable 100% cotton elastic belt.
With the nation’s opioid crisis raging, rates of cocaine and methamphetamine abuse soaring and recreational marijuana use becoming legal in nine states and the District, the concern about clean drug tests, too, has increased. While people have long tried to cheat drug exams with an array of creative methods — such as providing other people’s urine, attempting to flush their systems with gallons of water or using herbal remedies — authorities say synthetic urine has become the new go-to trick.
Related: The coming decline of the employment drug test
So much so that states are enacting laws to ban the sale of fake urine, which retails for about $17 to $40 in head shops, truck stops and on the Internet, and is easy to purchase. The substance — made from chemicals and, some claim, uric acid — goes by names including “Monkey Whizz” and “UPass.” Authorities say the products give drug users a way to sidestep screening exams administered by police, courts and employers for safety and security.
Laws making it illegal to sell or use synthetic urine or cheat on a drug test are on the books in at least 18 states, according to the National Conference of State Legislatures. Indiana and New Hampshire banned synthetic urine last year. Bills to do so were introduced this year in Missouri and Mississippi.
Mississippi’s bill was dubbed the “Urine Trouble Act,” drawing snickers and groans in the State House. But its sponsors and others said that the jokey name belies a real problem: Truck drivers, people who operate heavy machinery and others can use the synthetic liquid to easily thwart a drug test, potentially creating public risks.
“Our employers are reporting to us a concern that more and more of their employees are using synthetic human urine to cheat on a drug test,” said Dan Gibson, executive director of the Mississippi Association of Self-Insurers, which has lobbied for the bill.
Mississippi state Rep. Willie Bailey (D), speaking at a hearing in Jackson, held a bottle of fake urine that came with instructions suggesting that users could microwave it to achieve body temperature. He said the substance has been a “hot seller” in truck stops statewide.
“They can’t keep it in stock,” he said.
The bill passed the Mississippi House but died in the Senate. Gibson said his members were troubled that the legislation failed; the association plans to lobby for another effort next year.
“Maybe we’ll call it ‘urine trouble again,’ ” Gibson said.
David Powell, executive director of the Indiana Prosecuting Attorneys Council, has heard numerous accounts of people on probation getting caught with fake urine. They often try to slip it into cups while in the bathroom, where they are supposed to be providing urine samples.
“People can basically use it to avoid consequence with their employers and probation officers,” Powell said. “There’s just no other legitimate purpose for it.”
Companies nationwide have reported having trouble finding workers who can pass drug tests. The Federal Reserve reported in a “beige book” survey of economic activity last year that manufacturers have had difficulty hiring experienced or qualified employees, “with some citing candidates’ inability to pass drug tests or to consistently report to work.”
And when people see their livelihood or ability to stay out of jail as being dependent on passing a drug test, it can create a strong motivation to cheat on it.
“If it’s your job or you’re going to probation or you’re going to lose your kids, a lot of those folks will do anything to pass a drug test,” Powell said.
Randall was required to take a drug test as a condition of his probation. Police said the probation officer saw Randall holding a bottle of yellow liquid that he dropped into his underwear. Randall denied doing so, but police said he eventually turned the bottle over to the probation officer. Randall pleaded guilty to charges of tampering with physical evidence, a felony; his lawyer declined to comment on the case.
Opinion: Why are police departments still using drug field tests?
In some states, laws regarding fake urine have been spurred by tragedy.
Judy Tilton walked into her 21-year-old son’s room in 2015 and found him dead of a fentanyl overdose. Seth was cold to the touch, still sitting upright on his bed, a needle in his arm and a cellphone in his hand. He had been texting his drug dealer.
Overwhelmed with shock and grief, Tilton cleaned the room a few days later and stumbled upon an unopened bottle of synthetic urine, something that she didn’t even know existed.
“It just made me think and go, ‘Who else is using this?’ ” she said. “It could be a bus driver, it could be an aircraft pilot, a trucker driving down the road. They’re endangering everybody.”
Tilton, of New Hampshire, lobbied legislators to ban fake urine. She testified at the State House, showing lawmakers the box that she found in Seth’s room.
The U.S. Supreme Court first upheld the right to test for drugs in the workplace in 1989, and most of those tests now are conducted using urine samples. The federal government is looking at standardizing tests that use hair and saliva.
Barry Sample, director of science and technology for the Employer Solutions business of Quest Diagnostics, suggests that employers should rotate hair, saliva and urine tests to create an element of surprise for applicants and to make the options for possible cheats, such as fake urine, less useful.
Related: No simple blood or breath test can detect cannabis impairment, police say
But hair testing has been challenged in court, including by a group of black Boston Police officers who claim it is discriminatory because the texture of African American hair makes it more likely to yield false positives.
Most specimens undergo what is known as a five-panel test, during which they are screened for amphetamines, cocaine, marijuana, PCP and opioids.
The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration added a sixth — ecstasy — to the test administered to safety-sensitive workers. The agency approved testing federal workers for four prescription painkillers — OxyContin, Vicodin, Percocet and Dilaudid — last year, along with tests for heroin metabolites.
But urine testing remains the main method of detecting drugs in the body, and its private nature can be problematic.
“Urine tests are not observed,” Sample said. “It does afford those who want to cheat the opportunity to try to subvert the testing process.”
Alice Crites contributed to this report.
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This Monkey Whizz review was last updated in March 2020.
Contents
If you’re looking to pass a drug test, the detox success rates are lower than 20%, and those supplements are a bit untrustworthy.Then, there’s the option of using synthetic urine for your drug test. I spent countless hours researching popular urine belts for this Monkey Whizz review. Now let’s see how this company compares.
What Are These Products Used For?
If it sounds like I know exactly what I’m talking about when passing a drug test, it’s because I do! I was unemployed for a few months and was going heavy on the job hunt, and the post-hunt-blunt if I'm honest.
I had a few interviews but nothing promising, so I spent a weekend partying with my buddies to try to drown (and puff away) my sorrows.
The Monday after my party weekend, I got an email saying that I landed a second and final interview, which included a “standard drug test.”
Not only that, they wanted me to go in on Thursday! I needed the job, but I knew I had no time to flush my body out naturally.
I went into full research panic mode.
I didn't want to risk my sample with any pills or supplements (dude, I thought the point was to get through the screening, not pump my body with weird pills).
At that point, I knew my only option was a synthetic urine sample (see our other recommendations here), and I knew I had to go with the best since I only had one chance to pass this drug test and land a job.
I remembered that my buddies had used a synthetic product in the past, so I turned to them for advice. I also asked the guys in my head shop, figuring they would have knowledge and experience with different products.
One brand came out above all others: Monkey Whizz. Everyone said it was easy to use and extremely reliable. After using it myself, I have to agree. If I can figure out how to use, then anyone can!
Let’s look at the nitty-gritty details of how to properly use the Monkey Whizz product to pass your drug test.
How Do You Use a Monkey Whizz Kit?
So you've made the smart decision and gone with Serious Monkey Business' urination device. Good choice, Grasshopper.
Monkey Whizz is super easy to use, from the ordering process all the way through to actually getting it ready for use.
Once you order Monkey Whizz, they can ship it to you overnight. This is important if you’re in a rush, as you don’t want to tell ask your potential employer that you’d prefer to push out the urine drug test date.
There will also be no mention of Monkey Whizz by name on your credit card or on the package, so you don’t have to worry about people around you knowing what you’re up to.
For someone like me, who only had a day or two before going to the designated laboratory, it was an awesome and necessary benefit.
Monkey Whizz comes in two forms of the sample: powdered or premixed in a flask; both versions come with a belt that serves as a holster. They are both the same chemical composition, except the premixed is sterilized.
To prepare the powdered solution, simply put your sample in warm water and follow the same instructions you would if you were using the premixed solution.
Also, no worries, Monkey Whizz comes with idiot-proof step-by-step instructions - so even though I’m going to lay them out here, you’ll get fresh instructions delivered right to your door when you order to make sure you pass your drug test.
Monkey Whizz comes with two heating pads. Open up one and stick it to the outside of the flask, between the bag and the belt.
Wrap the Monkey Whizz kit around your waist, under your clothing. The temperature strip should be touching your skin, and the tube should be pointing to the floor.
Wear the flask nest to your body for one hour before use to make sure it’s comfortable, and the product temperature is right.
Make sure to check the temperature strip again before using Monkey Whizz for your drug test. The temperature should read between 96 to 100 degrees before use. This is the most important part - temperature is one of the main indicators of real or synthetic urine. The temperature strip can actually keep the temperature within the normal range for up to 8 hours.
Ideally, do this before you head into the lab, as it would raise suspicion otherwise.
To use it, unfasten the white clips and drain the contents.
Let’s see how this product measures up to its main competitor, The Whizz Kit.
How Does Monkey Whizz Stack Up Against The Whizz Kit?
Even though there's a lot of positive Monkey Whizz reviews, it's not the only belt brand on the market. If you do a little research on your own, you’ll find a couple of other brands of synthetic urine, but the Monkey Whizz’s main competitor is The Whizz Kit.
Does it really work? Look what one happy customer from a closed Facebook group said the following about her drug test.
One of the main benefits of Monkey Whizz vs the Whizz Kit is that it’s cheaper, although this should never be the main reason as you only have one shot at passing these drug tests.
Take into consideration that it can arrive overnight, and you’ll see that Monkey Whizz definitely beats The Whizz Kit company in the price and convenience department.
One other awesome thing about Monkey Whizz is its flask size! It’s way smaller than the Whizz Kit. Normally I wouldn't be calling something smaller a bonus, but in this case, it’s easier to use undetected - no matter what kind of supervision you have.
Also, it doesn't require a synthetic penis to use. This means that you can recommend Monkey Whizz to your lady friends or buddies, and it should work.
Lastly, Monkey Whizz contains uric acid and has all the other chemical components of organic pee. This means that this synthetic urine looks, smells, foams and will work like the real thing - human urine.
It’ll hold up under scrutiny if the sample is sent to the lab for further testing. The only thing it’s missing is actual human DNA (spoiler- no fake urine brand will be able to provide that).
Also, the product is sterile, so the fake piss will begin to grow bacteria when exposed to the air (just like human urine!).
Frequently Asked Questions
How Do You Wear Monkey Whizz?
You wear Monkey Whizz by using the included elastic belt.
The belt is very comfortable and thin, which makes it easy to fit under your clothes. It can also be used for people up to a 54-inch waist, making it suitable for the majority of people.
Does Monkey Whizz Expire?
Yes, Monkey Whizz expires after 12 months.
The reason for this is that some of the water will evaporate resulting in concentration levels that will not pass a standard drug test. If you are subject to regular tests, then don’t order too many for future use.
Can You Microwave Monkey Whizz?
No, you can’t microwave Monkey Whizz.
You should only use the included heat pack and your body to get it up to the right temperature of about 95F. Using a microwave can damage the pouch and mess with the creatine, which can be picked up during lab testing.
Does Monkey Whizz Have Creatinine?
Yes, Monkey Whiz contains creatinine in the right amount to not trigger fake sample warnings in lab tests.
Does Monkey Whizz Have Uric Acid?
Yes, Monkey Whizz contains an optimum level of uric acid based on average measures in a healthy adult.
What Is The Correct Temperature for The Test?
The correct temperature is between 96-100 degrees.
Monkey Whizz Quest Diagnostics 2018 Schedule
Monkey Whizz Review: The Final Verdict
In case you’re not already convinced, let me reassure - you Monkey Whizz will absolutely help you pass your drug test and is incredibly easy and convenient to use. It is one of my favorite brands.
Monkey Whizz Quest Diagnostics 2018
I've tried it, my friends tried it, and other people online have provided a very positive Monkey Whizz review. It works.
If you aren't convinced yet, go ahead and check out some forums about this stuff, you won't regret it.
It costs around $60 for the whole kit, flask, and caboodle. This includes:
- The 3.5 oz pouch filled with the sample
- An elastic belt that fits up to a 54 “ waist
- A refillable syringe
- Two heating pads
- Temperature strip
- And idiot-proof instructions.
Where Can I Buy Monkey Whizz?
Your package will contain enough to pass one urine test, and you should avoid reusing the belt and pouch. This does make it one of the more expensive brands, but it’s worth it given the high overall Monkey Whizz review.
A word to the wise..
Make sure you buy your Monkey Whizz from Serious Monkey Business, and any related products, directly from the manufacturer.
You don’t want to mess around and buy an inferior or expired sample.
If you buy it from the manufacturer, they will be able to send it overnight so that it will be available for your use the next day.
If you need a working sample to pass a urinalysis soon, and you want the best on the market, don’t hesitate. https://lotclever562.weebly.com/monkey-quest-mmo.html.
Take your test the right way and buy Monkey Whizz now so you can try it tomorrow!